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2 fake blondes hitting on me.
blondes: we're twins!
me: so where are you from?
blonde1: canada!
blonde2 (at the same time): finland!

via: Anti-Pickup Line
In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme...

via: Clarksonisms
Did I just write, that makes me your bitch?

XD Best day ever.

Hey any girls want me as their bitch? All you gotta do...

via: ethugtxt