He must have been a drug dealer! He held the door open for me.

CRACK! ...Oh god! I can't use that as a joke anymore, can I? Sorry! But seriously, I'm sober.

Don't perpetuate the stupidity.

You mean G as in Jose'?

You know that's what avocados are, right? Unicorn eggs.

No matter where you put it, it keeps making maps.

Sorry for being late, I got caught in a fax machine.

According to my own monitoring, billions of persons all over the world receive the personal loans from different banks. Therefore, there's great possibilities to receive a small business loan in any country.

It's funny, because you slid it in.

Potentially problematic, but technically possible.

At this point, the soup is under control.

but they only do hardcore peircings, no studs. so i went to claire's

The Amish are coming.

My boner rendered you speechless.

I was the bottom, there was nowhere else for it to go

There's not enough room, I can't fit; I can only give about 10 inches.

I like sucking on it.

I need to get some work done.

I can eat it off of the desk with my mouth, if you prefer.

I'll go in the back because I can't fit in the front.

Don't cross the streams, I learned that from Ghostbusters.

It's never okayto drug a baby.

I have to piss so bad that I cant piss.

Stop poking each other!" "That's what the prison guard said.

Quoted Coworkers