Stop poking each other!" "That's what the prison guard said.

thumb_up thumb_down -582

Don't cross the streams, I learned that from Ghostbusters.

thumb_up thumb_down -85

My boner rendered you speechless.

thumb_up thumb_down -637

I'm just going to slip it into my mouth...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I have to piss so bad that I cant piss.

thumb_up thumb_down -243

He must have been a drug dealer! He held the door open for me.

thumb_up thumb_down -488

It's never okayto drug a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -119

There's not enough room, I can't fit; I can only give about 10 inches.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You know that's what avocados are, right? Unicorn eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I was the bottom, there was nowhere else for it to go

thumb_up thumb_down -138

Don't perpetuate the stupidity.

thumb_up thumb_down +168

According to my own monitoring, billions of persons all over the world receive the personal loans from different banks. Therefore, there's great possibilities to receive a small business loan in any country.

thumb_up thumb_down -323

It's funny, because you slid it in.

thumb_up thumb_down +451

No matter where you put it, it keeps making maps.

thumb_up thumb_down +315

You mean G as in Jose'?

thumb_up thumb_down +178

Did someone knows where the processing cart is?

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Please help me. I've never had to take a shit so badly in my life.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

The Amish are coming.

thumb_up thumb_down -259

I'll go in the back because I can't fit in the front.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

I can eat it off of the desk with my mouth, if you prefer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I like sucking on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -156

I need to get some work done.

thumb_up thumb_down -421

Sorry for being late, I got caught in a fax machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

CRACK! ...Oh god! I can't use that as a joke anymore, can I? Sorry! But seriously, I'm sober.

thumb_up thumb_down -342

Quoted Coworkers